DUSTY BIBLES LEAD TO DIRTY LIVES...or so it says on
the board outside my beloved Apostolic Lighthouse. No danger of me
getting a dirty life, then - worst luck. I'm always careful to inhabit
a bible-free zone...
It did get me wondering, though. I got to thinking that maybe the
slogan was originally intended to boost productivity at the Gideons'
warehouse: ship them bibles out quick, or you'll have nothing to look
forward to but sin and evil! Then I thought that one of the guys who
worked there, desperate for some, shall we say, action, maybe kept a
box back - hid it in a forgotten corner of the complex, with the top
open, visiting it every day to check on how dusty his bibles were
getting, hoping against hope that each day's deposit would finally
swell the accumulated grime to the point where his new life could
begin. Finally, he could quit the miserable Gideons and embark on a
sex-, drugs- and alcohol-crazed career of utter debauchery. Maybe even
get a write-up in the Weekly World News...